The Psychologist Needs Therapy

Goodness. sakes. alive. 

Six months ago I was planning a wedding, working full time, and going to grad school and I thought I was the most stressed and mentally exhausted I'd ever been in my life. That very well could have been the truth, however, the past two weeks have been pretty taxing. 

I am currently in my second of three years of graduate school. This year I still attend class on Tuesday nights from 6pm-10pm, in addition to meeting Monday evenings for group supervision and another evening for individual supervision and also seeing clients. If I thought I was tired last year, I was really mistaken. THIS is tired. 

I really don't want this to be a complaining post, because I'm not unhappy, I am just tired. Mentally exhausted. I'm sure every one of us feels this way on a frequent basis. In fact, I am praying for my friends in retail right now because I know they're about to feel it more and more. However, there has just been something about this week. I treated myself tonight. I got myself something for dinner that I haven't eaten in over a year. It's something I used to eat every few weeks in college with my roomies. It is....

 

Niro's Gyros-Double Gyro Plate *nom nom nom*

It really did cheer me up though. This week, Monday-Friday from 8:30-5:00, I have to take part in a state mandated training. The training predominately focuses on sex offenders and every topic related to them. I'm not sure if you've ever spent an entire day in an auditorium listening to perpetrator apologies, sexual check-ins (where they list all their offenses), and statistics on offenders, but it really does something to you mentally. 

On top of listening to that all day, Monday night I had to go to supervision, Tuesday night I had a midterm and 2 hours of lecture and tonight I had  a client to counsel. That gyro plate was the difference between me and screaming me. Notice there are no fries in the picture. That's because I ate them in the car on the way home. Niro's fries are amazing. They're steak fries and they are as big around as my fingers, and trust me, I have CHUBBY fingers. 

I love my job. I really, really do. I also love school most days. I know that the light at the end of this tunnel is not that far away. The thing I'm trying to remember right now is "Viva Villa!"

As cliche as it may be, the reason I titled my blog as such, was really more of a challenge than anything. I don't want to just "bide my time" or wait until the next big thing in my life. A lot of brides, especially newlyweds, can almost encounter a quasi-post-partum depression from wedding planning and the hoopla around getting married. 

I didn't want to just fall into this routine of complacency. I know that right now isn't technically the most exciting time of my life, however, I get to choose whether to weather it or triumph through it. I don't want to just live...I want to LIVE. 

When I come home exhausted, I literally fight everything within myself not to go to sleep or be a complete bum. I remind myself to do something I love so that I can live everyday. It's so easy to get sucked into a routine. It happened A LOT when I was working retail. I'd go through the motions of Monday-Wednesday because I knew Thursday was my day off and that would be a "fun day". I don't want to do that anymore. I don't want to spend everyday waiting for the next day, I want to live everyday as if it's the "fun day". Today...was not very fun. However, I got a gyro and I played my guitar and I wrote a blog. It wasn't just a Wednesday. Tomorrow? I'm going to training, I'm coming home and arranging a medley on my guitar that I was quasi-arranging during training today *shhhhh* 

Friday? I get to hang out with at least four of the people in this photo

and I get to have a slumber party, and I get to see Dot Dot Dot.

I would like to challenge all of you to continue LIVING. You may not be in the perfect job right now. You may not be in the best financial standing. You may have had the worst week in the world. I just beg you, choose to live. It's so much more rewarding. 

P.S. Aren't my friends awesome??